It's September!
Sep. 1st, 2011 07:49 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
So there's going to be a bunch of articles about school!
Ana was talking to me about her teachers and school, and boy did she ever have a lot to say! She doesn't like that her teachers always claim that when THEY were kids THEY always acted right and never were disrespectful or misbehaved in any way. This is clearly a lie. (And it clearly is, and a stupid one, no argument here.) She doesn't like that some kids get pulled out of class for special reasons and she never does. (After talking with her, I managed to get it across that they're not being pulled out of class because the teachers like them more, but because they probably need special help. It seems one of them won't do any of his work...?) She doesn't like that her kindergarten teacher was so awesome that she managed to set an impossibly high standard - seriously, she went on and on and ON about exactly why her kindergarten teacher was such a good teacher, using many specific details. I eventually told her she should write it all down and tell the woman next time she sees her, because it'd be helpful. (It'd be more helpful for the others, I guess, but how could that go over well? Forget it.)
And we talked about other things. Apparently, she thinks that the most popular girl in her grade is beautiful. Everybody thinks that. Except she's not very nice. (According to Ana, anyway.) And several other named people are pretty too. Which led to two discussions:
1. In five years, this girl A will think she's fat and want to be slender like Ana (Ana giggled, because the girl in question IS big compared to her - but then, who isn't?), that girl B will think she's too skinny and want to look more like A, a third girl C will just think she's ugly and want a face more like B's face, and D will want C's hair. And it's all a pointless waste of time.
2. There's pretty on the outside and there's pretty on the inside, and people can get over not having the first but very rarely get over not having the second. Ana apparently managed to completely and pointlessly antagonize That Popular Girl in her grade last year, and it didn't make her happy in the end (well, really, I could've told her that saying to the girl's face that she's mean was a bad idea, even if it IS true), but as I pointed out, there's probably lots of other kids who wish they could be brave and kind like Ana is. That doesn't mean they're going to be nice or are going to be her friend, but you have to take what you can get.
So we'll see what happens this year. Ana isn't convinced she doesn't want to transfer schools, but truthfully, I don't see her social problems (the extent of which she only was willing to talk about in June) as changing just because she changes schools. That's assuming that she has as many problems as she thinks. I pick her up, I see kids randomly hugging her as they say goodbye, and while it's possible they're all really being manipulative, they're not hugging everybody and calling out to them.
Anyway! Articles!
Growth scores give schools No Child Left Behind alternative
Basically they're saying that if you're evaluating teachers, evaluate by how much they taught, not whether they were magically able to pull 33 kids up to grade level from being 3 years behind. If they do a year's worth of work, that's a year's worth of teaching. I think that's fair.
PS 70 in Queens has the city's worst bedbug problem. I really only linked this for the first sentence:
This is one grade a Queens elementary school wished it hadn't scored highest in the city.
What an unusual way to form a sentence, don't you think?
And this piece on independent learning in a school
Ana was talking to me about her teachers and school, and boy did she ever have a lot to say! She doesn't like that her teachers always claim that when THEY were kids THEY always acted right and never were disrespectful or misbehaved in any way. This is clearly a lie. (And it clearly is, and a stupid one, no argument here.) She doesn't like that some kids get pulled out of class for special reasons and she never does. (After talking with her, I managed to get it across that they're not being pulled out of class because the teachers like them more, but because they probably need special help. It seems one of them won't do any of his work...?) She doesn't like that her kindergarten teacher was so awesome that she managed to set an impossibly high standard - seriously, she went on and on and ON about exactly why her kindergarten teacher was such a good teacher, using many specific details. I eventually told her she should write it all down and tell the woman next time she sees her, because it'd be helpful. (It'd be more helpful for the others, I guess, but how could that go over well? Forget it.)
And we talked about other things. Apparently, she thinks that the most popular girl in her grade is beautiful. Everybody thinks that. Except she's not very nice. (According to Ana, anyway.) And several other named people are pretty too. Which led to two discussions:
1. In five years, this girl A will think she's fat and want to be slender like Ana (Ana giggled, because the girl in question IS big compared to her - but then, who isn't?), that girl B will think she's too skinny and want to look more like A, a third girl C will just think she's ugly and want a face more like B's face, and D will want C's hair. And it's all a pointless waste of time.
2. There's pretty on the outside and there's pretty on the inside, and people can get over not having the first but very rarely get over not having the second. Ana apparently managed to completely and pointlessly antagonize That Popular Girl in her grade last year, and it didn't make her happy in the end (well, really, I could've told her that saying to the girl's face that she's mean was a bad idea, even if it IS true), but as I pointed out, there's probably lots of other kids who wish they could be brave and kind like Ana is. That doesn't mean they're going to be nice or are going to be her friend, but you have to take what you can get.
So we'll see what happens this year. Ana isn't convinced she doesn't want to transfer schools, but truthfully, I don't see her social problems (the extent of which she only was willing to talk about in June) as changing just because she changes schools. That's assuming that she has as many problems as she thinks. I pick her up, I see kids randomly hugging her as they say goodbye, and while it's possible they're all really being manipulative, they're not hugging everybody and calling out to them.
Anyway! Articles!
Growth scores give schools No Child Left Behind alternative
Basically they're saying that if you're evaluating teachers, evaluate by how much they taught, not whether they were magically able to pull 33 kids up to grade level from being 3 years behind. If they do a year's worth of work, that's a year's worth of teaching. I think that's fair.
PS 70 in Queens has the city's worst bedbug problem. I really only linked this for the first sentence:
This is one grade a Queens elementary school wished it hadn't scored highest in the city.
What an unusual way to form a sentence, don't you think?
And this piece on independent learning in a school
no subject
Date: 2011-09-02 06:32 pm (UTC)As a much older person now, I feel a bit sorry for the kid who bit other kids. Because it was almost certainly a downward spiral. He probably bit people out of frustration or anger. But we tended to avoid him and not want to play with him (because he sometimes bit people, which was a somewhat understandable reason on our part), but that probably made him feel worse. I hope things worked out alright for him as he got older. I was not a social child or a liked child myself, but I wasn't inclined to be nice to some of the other outcasts at some of the points in my schooling. I just had no tolerance for those who lashed out physically then, but I have more sympathy for it in a young child now.
no subject
Date: 2011-09-02 07:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-09-02 07:09 pm (UTC)I think it's good you explained it to her given the situation you had to handle, but I also think it's good that probably most of the kids in the class didn't perceive people pulled out as a negative thing associated with them.
no subject
Date: 2011-09-02 07:50 pm (UTC)She's really a good kid. I love her to death.
no subject
Date: 2011-09-02 06:38 pm (UTC).... unusual, yes - there's something wrong with it, but I'm not sure what. You wouldn't say "This is one grade a Queens elementary school scored highest in the city", nor even "A Queens elementary school scored this grade highest in the city">, but on the other hand, you couldn't get away with "This is one grade upon which..." or anything similar either. Sometimes grammar has to be sacrificed for the sake of brevity, especially in journalism.
A book I think Ana will love is The Changeling by Zilpha Keatley Snyder.
When my daughter was about that age, we had a lot of talks about how 'cool' is for losers: people who haven't got much in the way of intellect, manners or morals, whose lives therefore revolve around showing off and putting others down to try to make themselves seem 'better'. This is why the Popular Crowd traditionally hates and torments those who do have intellect, manners and morals, especially if they're also pretty.
Ana is very pretty, and she's going to be drop-dead gorgeous in a few short years, so it's time for her to start learning about the ways a beautiful woman has to comport herself differently from one who is not so beautiful. It does no good to teach her that beauty doesn't matter, in a world where it patently DOES matter a great deal in almost every aspect of one's life. Jealousy and favoritism are both very real, recurring, unavoidable problems and it's not easy to figure how to deal with them gracefully.
If any of my former kindergarten pupils wrote a letter to me saying why I was a good teacher, it would totally make my day; I'd cherish that letter forever. I hope Ana does write to her dear teacher; I'm sure she will get a reply, and then who could possibly find any fault with her proudly showing both the letter and the reply to her current teachers, or even reading them aloud?
no subject
Date: 2011-09-02 06:58 pm (UTC)At any rate, it's not that beauty doesn't matter, it's that worrying about it is a waste of time. Either people think you're pretty or they don't.
no subject
Date: 2011-09-03 05:00 am (UTC)Both your nieces are clearly going to grow up to be beauties, and the girls who make fun of Ana for being skinny are probably already dying of jealousy. My daughter got the same thing all through school, plus people insinuating that she was anorexic, which she never has been - it's just her genes; both her parents were also skinny kids.
Anyway: beautiful girls who act insecure about their appearances are extremely irritating. It sounds phoney, shallow and vain when a prettier-than-average person complains about not being pretty enough: the phrase "fishing for compliments" springs instantly to mind.
"I think she thinks it's all grown-up stuff, because we can't very well say she's ugly."
Well, no, but if she was ugly, or even just average-looking, you wouldn't be telling her she was going to grow up to be a beauty. It's quite possible that she already does realize she's prettier-than-average, but doesn't want to admit it because it scares her.
no subject
Date: 2011-09-03 03:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-09-03 04:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-09-02 08:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-09-03 03:19 am (UTC)